Maybe

A parable I keep coming back to, popularized by Alan Watts – the story of the Chinese farmer. A story that serves as a continuous reminder to remain open and curious, rather than certain and overly confident about how things ought to be. /// Once upon a time there was a Chinese farmer whose horse […]

Deploying love

Who is the one that can deploy love when life is seemingly unmanageable and feels all consuming? Thoughts at 3:20 am in the mt hood national forest. Sleepless and my body feeling so tired from still recovering from being sick and trying to care for three kids while my wife is home sick. I’m exhausted. […]

Constant Work

To be great, there must be constant work. I’ve subscribed to this idea that there should be balance. In some respects, sure. But really, most people abuse the notion of balance. They really want non-work. I do. I’ve also often felt like things shouldn’t feel so difficult. Or take so long. Inhaling the potent fumes […]

True Magic

Going through this second round of True and False Magic (by Phil Stutz). It’s the good kind of déjà vu. Reminders that patience wins. That acceptance of life’s pain, uncertainty, and need for constant work produces progress in the direction of real living. Steadiness can merge with action and to unroot the truth behind the […]

Unfinished business

An infinity pool of activity Quelling anxiety Fleeting peace My mind is both a problem solving machine And the creator of to dos If I can’t solve one I can solve some And the control feels good, but still weighs a ton Momentary relief settles before I grab again for the pen and articulate My need […]

Age of the Spirit

11.19.20 (audio) – Kirsten and Brandon

Magic Marker

I wanted to talk about tattoos. Specifically my tattoos. I haven’t really displayed or documented the art I’ve decided to permanently scribble on my skin. And I never was really someone who thought they’d have tattoos, not to mention many tattoos. I currently have my entire right arm covered in various pieces. Some of these […]

High Church

The idea of high church is traditionally guided by a belief that formality and uniformity are most important to a connection to/with the Divine. It’s a structure, a container meant for facilitating order. River (Nick) and I both attended a popular Christian liberal arts University in southern CA and were roommates. We studied biblical and […]

But I cried more

(from my notes on my phone when Beau was born) Most of my life growing up I was a sensitive kid. What I mean by “sensitive” is that I expressed my emotions, mainly sad or ones that caused me to cry, easily and freely. I didn’t feel a lot of resistance to my body’s natural […]

Pass It

When we hold on to something too long, past its time of maturation, a process of expiration will inevitably take place. It’s not impossible to go forward after this. It’s just more difficult, in my experience. There are windows of Time we are given to learn, grow, expand and live in a certain Mode of […]